Review – Men In Black 3

With Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Josh Brolin, Emma Thompson, Jemaine Clement. Written by Etan Cohen, David Koepp, Jeff Nathanson, Michael Soccio. Directed by Barry Sonnenfeld. Rated PG-13 for sci-fi action violence, and brief suggestive content. 106 minutes.

It’s been a decade since “Men In Black II,” one of those sequels that has largely been forgotten. (See also – or rather, don’t see also – movies like “The Fly II” or “Ghostbusters II.”)  MEN IN BLACK 3 is an attempt to resuscitate the series by focusing on what made the 1997 original fun: the relationship between veteran agent K (Tommy Lee Jones) and newcomer agent J (Will Smith) as they track down rogue aliens on Earth.

Interestingly, Jones is barely in the film, appearing in just a few scenes at the beginning and then at the end. What makes the film work is a marvelous performance by Josh Brolin as a younger 1969 version of K. The burden was on him to make us believe that he would turn into the already established character created by another actor, and he joins the pantheon of Robert DeNiro (as Don Corleone in “The Godfather, Part II”) and Ewan McGregor (as Obi-wan Kenobi in the otherwise unwatchable “Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace”) in pulling off this delicate task.

The story begins in the present where Boris the Animal (Jemaine Clement) escapes from prison. He is an ugly and dangerous alien thanks to makeup wizard Rick Baker’s creative special effects. Boris plans to return to 1969 – where K shot off his arm and defeated him – to change history. When K disappears from the present, J goes back to 1969 to try to set things right.

As befits a summer popcorn movie, one isn’t expected to take the proceedings too seriously. When the agents show up at The Factory to confront artist/impresario Andy Warhol (Bill Hader), we know that we’re going to have fun with this “Back to the Future” ride to the ‘60s. Consider this “Men In Black” meets “Mad Men.” At one point, J is pulled over by two racist cops who believe that a black man in a flashy car must have stolen it. He points out that that isn’t the case – except that in the instant case he has stolen the car although he intends to return it. There are also some fun references to things as varied as the New York Mets, Apollo 11, and various retro-technology.

Smith and Brolin build up a nice rapport, neatly mirroring the Smith/Jones relationship in the earlier films. Rip Torn (who played agency head Z) is missed, although the agency is now run by Agent O, played nicely by Emma Thompson. Although this is not deep dish science fiction, the four (!) screenwriters let the time travel paradoxes play themselves out, helped by the character of Griffin (Michael Stuhlbarg), who has the ability to see various probabilities of the future.

“Men In Black 3” has laughs, thrills, special effects, and some entertaining by-play with Smith and Brolin. It won’t change your life nor will it boggle you with its concepts. However, if you let it, this is a movie prepared to entertain. If you’re expecting any more from an early summer season blockbuster, you’re going to be disappointed.•••

Daniel M. Kimmel is a veteran movie critic and author of a host of film-related books, the most recent being Jar Jar Binks Must Die… And Other Observations About Science Fiction Movies. He teaches film at Suffolk University and lives in Somerville.

Review – Battleship

With Taylor Kitsch, Liam Neeson, Alexander Skarsgård, Rihanna, Brooklyn Decker. Written by Erich Hoeber & Jon Hoeber. Directed by Peter Berg. Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of violence, action and destruction, and for language. 131 minutes.

For the record, no one in BATTLESHIP ever actually says the line immortalized in the TV commercials, “You sank my battleship!” It’s about the only thing missing in this movie which takes a game that started with pencil-and-paper prior to World War I, became a (direct) hit for Milton Bradley in the 1960s and by way of this modern spectacle, transformers into an alien invasion story. The result is a movie that makes absolutely no sense at all. Instead, director Peter Berg and screenwriters Erich Hoeber and Jon Hoeber seem to have decided to make the most absurd summer blockbuster movie they could, as if they were working from a checklist from the scheisse-meister himself, Michael Bay.

In fact, there are several movies going on at once, as if this was a variation of the storytelling game in which you advance the plot you’ve been handed and leave things a complete mess for the next person. It starts out as a science fiction movie with scientists discovering an Earth-like planet around another star and sending them a signal. We then move to a comedy about two brothers. Stone Hopper (Alexander Skarsgård) is a naval officer while his brother Alex (Taylor Kitsch, recently not seen as the lead in “John Carter”) is full of wasted potential. He proceeds to prove this by trying to impress the beautiful Sam (Brooklyn Decker) by breaking into a convenience store to get her a chicken burrito.

We then get a service film where the American and Japanese navies are on maneuvers in the Pacific, and Alex, who has joined up, is heading for a less-than-honorable discharge. Oh, and he and Sam are now in love, but Sam’s father (Liam Neeson), is the commander of the fleet. Then the science fiction movie returns when aliens – apparently with faster-than-light drives for their spaceships – are coming to Earth to attack. Why? Why do they create a force field around part of the fleet? Why do they cause mass destruction and death and yet spare the lives of individuals? Who knows? Who cares? Certainly not the filmmakers. The aliens are simply the “enemy.”

This leads to lots of CGI destruction and lots of dead people (only one of whom we in the audience are invited to care about) and more plot churning including scenes where the humans attempt to take out the moving alien ships using a grid just like the one in the “Battleship” game. Since logic has long since been rendered flotsam, there are numerous other characters who pop up for no particular reason, from the Secretary of Defense (Peter MacNichol) to pop star Rihanna as a naval officer whose chief job seems to be to run through the ship when ordered to do so by Alex. Let’s not forget the plot twist that gets a bunch of World War II and Korean War veterans into action when the old USS Missouri is pressed back into service.

In short, the movie lacks any narrative coherence whatsoever. Plot strands are tied up by way of a scene after the closing credits promises – or threatens – a sequel. However, since the characters aren’t quite as developed as the plastic pegs in the board game, we’re never really engaged. If the movie works at all it is as a gigantic goof on the elements that make up contemporary blockbusters. There are scenes that echo “Transformers,” “Space Cowboys,” “Terminator,” and other movies, but don’t lead to any kind of rational storytelling.

“Battleship” will get a lot of negative reviews and deservedly so, but my suggestion is that people lighten up. It’s a movie based on a board game. Why did you expect anything more?•••

Daniel M. Kimmel is a veteran movie critic and author of a host of film-related books, the most recent being Jar Jar Binks Must Die… And Other Observations About Science Fiction Movies. He teaches film at Suffolk University and lives in Somerville.

Review – What To Expect When You’re Expecting

With Cameron Diaz, Jennifer Lopez, Elizabeth Banks, Brooklyn Decker, Anna Kendrick. Written by Shauna Cross, Heather Hach. Directed by Kirk Jones. Rated PG-13 for crude and sexual content, thematic elements and language. 110 minutes.

The makers of WHAT TO EXPECT WHEN YOU’RE EXPECTING take the title of the popular self-help book for parents-to-be and film the index. Well, not quite, but in providing a comedic drama about five couples dealing with baby issues, they manage to check off a whole list of topics from sensitive nipples and weight gain to epidurals and circumcision. More serious moments tackle topics like miscarriages and adoption. What the movie doesn’t do is provide much depth to any of the characters.

Wendy and Gary (Elizabeth Banks, Ben Falcone) hit all the expected speed bumps in the process, even though she runs a store for infant clothes and products. Her pregnancy doesn’t go quite the way she imagined. Gary’s highly-competitive father Ramsey (Dennis Quaid) has gotten his much younger second wife pregnant. Skyler (Brooklyn Decker) looks like a model and isn’t experiencing the slightest problem. Then there’s TV personality Jules (Cameron Diaz) who is pregnant by her TV dance partner Evan (Matthew Morrison). And there’s photographer Holly (Jennifer Lopez) and her partner Alex (Rodrigo Santoro), who are looking to adopt an Ethiopian baby together. Finally, Rosie (Anna Kendrick) gets pregnant after a fling with former high school classmate and competing food truck operator Marco (Chace Crawford).

Hijinks ensue from a chorus of the “Dudes Club” – guys who are already fathers led by Vic (Chris Rock) – who point out how their lives ended with parenthood. We also get the various problems that arise from such things as morning sickness and the onset of labor. As noted, there are some touching moments too but one gets the sense that the filmmakers had their list of topics and exchanged high fives after doing, say, a scene involving a C-section birth. Cross that one off.

The performers are pleasant enough and there’s enough light humor to avoid the train wrecks of such multi-character movies like “New Year’s Eve” and the current “Think Like A Man.” The competitiveness between Ramsey and Gary is really lame, with both actors being better than the material. The film does much better by its female characters with Kendrick (“Up In The Air,” “50/50″) once again proving she’s got a long career ahead of her if she wants it. Diaz and Banks get to play women who think they’re on top of everything and discover that the miracle of life has other plans for them. Lopez is stuck with the thankless part of the adoptive parent where things go much too easily to fit into the limited running time. Perhaps the surprise here is Decker (“Just Go With It,” “Battleship”), a striking former model who hits some unexpected notes as the person with the flawless body and the equally flawless pregnancy. She even gets a scene in which she demonstrates that she can be more than the cartoon characters she’s been playing all along.

“What To Expect When You’re Expecting” is not a great film by any stretch-mark of the imagination, but it manages to get through its running time without too many lulls. It provides some genuinely funny and real moments so that people who have gone through one or more pregnancies themselves can relate. It’s odd to release a film like this now but one suspects this is the movie women will go see this weekend while the guys are flocking to “Battleship.”•••

Daniel M. Kimmel is a veteran movie critic and author of a host of film-related books, the most recent being Jar Jar Binks Must Die… And Other Observations About Science Fiction Movies. He teaches film at Suffolk University and lives in Somerville.

Review – The Dictator

With Sacha Baron Cohen, Anna Faris, Ben Kingsley, Adeel Akhtar, John C. Reilly. Written by Sacha Baron Cohen, Alec Berg, David Mandel, Jeff Schaffer. Directed by Larry Charles. Rated R for strong crude and sexual content, brief male nudity, language and some violent images. 83 minutes.

Like many recent comedies, THE DICTATOR is not a prime example of the well-made film. Instead, it’s a collection of hit-or-miss gags, ranging from the clever to the crude. What’s perhaps funniest is that the same folks who praised trash like “The Hangover” and “Bridesmaids” will fault “The Dictator” for its rough edges. What’s the difference? Instead of appealing to overgrown adolescents, this is a movie that assumes you have at least a passing familiarity with current events.

Sacha Baron Cohen stars as Admiral General Aladeen of the mythical North African country of Wadiya. He’s a brutal dictator sitting on a lot of oil wealth, but has not invited the industrialized nations in to exploit his resources. Thus his Uncle Tamir (Ben Kingsley) is preparing a coup, with a double taking the place of Aladeen. The plot involves Aladeen coming to New York to address the UN but being kidnapped by his head of security (John C. Reilly) so that the uncle’s plot may go into place.

Aladeen escapes but has no way to prove his identity – his signature beard has been cut off – and so he ends up at a health food supermarket run by Zoey (Anna Faris), a left-wing feminist who has no idea that Aladeen is someone other than a refugee named Alison Burgers. When Zoey gets the contract to provide the exotic food for the Wadiya event where a new “democratic” constitution will be unveiled (secretly allowing China and big oil to take over the country) Aladeen sees the way to regain control.

Much of the humor is low, from Zoey teaching Aladeen how to masturbate, to his double – a goat herder – being at a loss what to do with the nubile women provided for his pleasure. However, there is also a political sensibility here that provides some big laughs, from the dedication of the film to the memory of fellow dictator Kim Jong-Il, to a speech about how all the great contemporary dictators (like Saddam Hussein, Muammar Khadafy and Dick Cheney) are no longer in power. It’s the sort of movie where if you don’t like a joke you should wait a minute because another one will show up shortly to try to do the job.

Cohen, who co-wrote the script, has his best role since “Borat” in creating a dictator who hates Israel but decides he likes Yiddish because the words sound like what they mean. Cohen, who is Jewish, has a lot of fun skewering the anti-Zionism of the Arab world. A brunette Anna Faris, almost unrecognizable to those who have seen her in movies like “The House Bunny,” demonstrates that she is one of the funniest actresses working today. Like Cohen, she gets her laughs playing her cartoonish character absolutely straight.

This is a movie that may make you laugh or may make you squirm. A scene where Aladeen is talking about his Porsche but seems – in his native language – to be planning a new 9/11 may strike some in bad taste, yet it neatly skewers the paranoia of contemporary America. Likewise his speech about how America would be better off as a dictatorship – in which he describes a situation reflecting how we actually live – may cut a bit close to the bone. It is the intelligence behind the slapstick and broad comedy that may ultimately sink the film with viewers.

Nonetheless, for all its flaws “The Dictator” is a very funny movie. It’s precisely the comic commentary that is a perfect fit for our times.•••

Daniel M. Kimmel is a veteran movie critic and author of a host of film-related books, the most recent being Jar Jar Binks Must Die… And Other Observations About Science Fiction Movies. He teaches film at Suffolk University and lives in Somerville.

Review – Dark Shadows

With Johnny Depp, Michelle Pfeiffer, Eva Green, Helena Bonham Carter, Bella Heathcote. Written by Seth Grahame-Smith. Directed by Tim Burton. Rated PG-13 for comic horror violence, sexual content, some drug use, language and smoking. 113 minutes.

It’s a safe bet that many people going to see DARK SHADOWS will be only vaguely aware of the late 1960s gothic soap opera upon which it is based. This latest collaboration between director Tim Burton and actor Johnny Depp is easily the best thing they’ve done together since “Sweeney Todd” and before that, “Ed Wood.” Unlike the indication in the early trailers, it hasn’t let the comic relief overwhelm the gothic melodrama.

Barnabas Collins (Depp) comes to Maine as a young boy in the 18th century where his family starts their fortune in the fishing industry. The housemaid Angelique (Eva Green) has an affair with him but when she desires his love he says that is impossible. Unknown to him, she is a witch and she turns him into a vampire and subsequently leaves him buried alive… er, undead… for two centuries. After this prologue we go to 1972 Collinsport, where the Collins family is still under a curse and the town business has been taken over by the supposed descendent of Angelique (who is really the witch herself).

The metal coffin containing Barnabas is uncovered and soon he is part of the family: matriarch Elizabeth (Michelle Pfeiffer), wastrel brother Roger (Jonny Lee Miller), her daughter Carolyn (Chloë Grace Moretz), and Roger’s son David (Gulliver McGrath), who is haunted by the ghost of his late mother. Also on hand is a drunken psychiatrist (Helena Bonham Carter) who is supposedly treating David, and Victoria Winters (Bella Heathcote), the new nanny and the seeming reincarnation of Barnabas’s true love Josette, whom Angelique bewitched and sent to her death.

This might seem ripe for spoofing. There are some laughs, many of them from the film playing off its 1972 setting, including an appearance by rock star Alice Cooper as a digitally age-regressed version of himself. While this is a film with a great oldies soundtrack, Burton restrains himself for a change, letting the moody atmospherics and raw emotions have center stage. In that sense, this may be one of his most controlled films since “Edward Scissorhands.” Depp is true to the spirit of the original Barnabas in playing him as tortured and lovelorn, the reluctant vampire who would trade his immortality for the return of his true love. (Several original cast members, including the late Jonathan Frid who originated Barnabas, appear in the party scene.)

The only one who is really over-the-top – because that’s what the part calls for – is the luscious Eva Green. Denied the only lover she ever wanted, her Angelique has wreaked vengeance on the Collins family for two centuries with no end in sight. The big love scene between Barnabas and Angelique is positively feral with their pent-up desire being unleashed, revealing much about their characters.

As with “Sweeney Todd,” it seems that the source material for “Dark Shadows” was the perfect inspiration for both Burton and Depp to take something with a strong pre-existing structure and adapt it for their own purposes. The result is something that will delight and surprise fans wondering if both of them had already done their best work in the past, and gives one hope for a summer movie season that is just getting underway.•••

Daniel M. Kimmel is a veteran movie critic and author of a host of film-related books, the most recent being Jar Jar Binks Must Die… And Other Observations About Science Fiction Movies. He teaches film at Suffolk University and lives in Somerville.

Review – The Avengers

With Robert Downey Jr., Chris Evans, Scarlett Johansson, Mark Ruffalo, Samuel L. Jackson. Written and directed by Joss Whedon. Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of sci-fi violence and action throughout, and a mild drug reference. 143 minutes.

There are two groups who are absolutely going to love THE AVENGERS. First are the Marvel fanboys (and fangirls) who have sat through both “Iron Man” movies, “The Hulk,” “Thor” and “Captain America” salivating at the prospect of their favorite comic superheroes finally being together on the big screen. (No disrespect, but this reviewer was a DC Comics fan and will undoubtedly feel the same way if the rumored “Justice League Of America” movie ever gets made.)

Second are those who live to see massive destruction and CGI special effects in their movie blockbusters, and pay no attention to trivia like character or plot. This movie has robot suits, monsters, creatures from another dimension, Norse gods, and much fighting and crashing and exploding. What’s not to like?

For the rest of us, though, “The Avengers” is an entertaining enough ride that lacks any real narrative weight. It’s “Transformers” with better – much better – dialogue. Credit for that goes to writer-director Joss Whedon who has to be wondering if it’s worth the effort. “Cabin In The Woods,” which he co-wrote, sat on the shelf for a couple of years before finally being released, and will make only a fraction of what “The Avengers” will do at the box office. Yet “Cabin” is a much better film.

Whedon seems to have taken his cue from the “Star Trek” reboot. If the audience is coming for the heroes, who cares about the villain or the plot? The villain is Loki (Tom Hiddleston) who is here, apparently, because he was the original villain the Avengers faced in the comics. His motives are muddled and, in the end, we really don’t care. He’s closer to the Romulan Nero in “Star Trek” than to the gold standard of big screen comic villains, the Joker (whether played by Jack Nicholson or the late Heath Ledger). He snarls and he sneers and if he had a moustache he would undoubtedly twirl it, but he can’t hold our attention.

Whedon focuses on the heroes and gives us some funny moments between Tony Stark/Iron Man (Robert Downey, Jr.) and Bruce Banner/The Hulk (Mark Ruffalo replacing Edward Norton who replaced Eric Bana). There’s a good throwaway bit early on with Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson) as well as an amusing confrontation between the Hulk and Loki. Yet Thor (Chris Hemsworth) and Captain America (Chris Evans) are as bland as ever, although Whedon gets a laugh or two out of the 1940’s Captain’s disconnect from 2012.

There are a few moments that are more than a snappy line or an amusement park thrill. One is the death of a character – not to be spoiled here – that manages to be both witty and poignant, a Whedon specialty. Another is Loki forcing a crowd to kneel before him in Berlin and one elderly man refusing to do so. The implication is that he is a Holocaust survivor, but unfortunately there’s no follow-through.

So if you love CGI effects or are so immersed in the Marvel universe that you’re wondering when Spider-Man and Wolverine will be joining the Avengers, you’ll have a great time. And when you stay through the closing credits for BOTH extra scenes, you’ll be able to explain who that guy is who grins at the audience and who means nothing to us non-Marvelites. On the other hand, if the first “Iron Man” was the only one in this series you thought worth seeing, one viewing of “The Avengers” should be plenty.•••

Daniel M. Kimmel is a veteran movie critic and author of a host of film-related books, the most recent being Jar Jar Binks Must Die… And Other Observations About Science Fiction Movies. He teaches film at Suffolk University and lives in Somerville.

Review – The Pirates! Band Of Misfits

With the voices of Hugh Grant, Salma Hayek, Martin Freeman, Imelda Staunton, Jeremy Piven. Written by Gideon Defoe. Directed by Peter Lord, Jeff Newitt. Rated PG (for mild action, rude humor and some language). 88 minutes.

When it comes to animation, it really pays to note which company is responsible for the film. In the US, the fact that Pixar has produced a film is almost always a guarantee of not only good animation, but solid writing and characterization. In England, the animation house that promises quirky characters, engagingly silly plots, and delightful witty dialogue is Aardman Animations. Their credits include the Wallace and Gromit movies, “Shaun the Sheep,” “Arthur Christmas,” “Flushed Away,” and “Chicken Run.”

THE PIRATES! BAND OF MISFITS is a wonderful send-up of countless pirate movies, but can still be fully appreciated by someone who is not seen a single one. It’s not a parody of the genre so much as a comic entry in it. One quickly gets caught up in the misadventures of this motley crew.

The Pirate Captain (voice of Hugh Grant) is convinced this is the year he will be named the Pirate of the Year, even though his haul of booty is decidedly meager. By chance, he comes across the scientist Charles Darwin (David Tennant) who believes that the captain’s pet bird is, in fact, a living example of what was thought to be an extinct species and, thus, worth a fortune. If you think you know what happens next you’ll be surprised. Darwin – and his chimp’s – attempt to steal the rare dodo and the captain’s attempt to pass himself off as a renowned scientist are only the beginning of the strange twists in store here.

The pleasure of the Aardman films is their willingness to be odd. Whether its chickens thinking they can learn to fly or a dog with more sense than his master, this is inspired silliness. Here we have pirates who not only compete for the pirate equivalent of the Oscar, but a band of supposed cutthroats whose highlight is not plundering other ships but “ham night,” when the captain serves a big ham. Indeed, some of the most inspired nonsense is understated as with the pirate who is obviously a girl wearing a fake beard, but for whom we never get an explanation as to why she’s doing it or why no one else can see through her absurd disguise.

The downside is that in spite of a notable voice cast, you probably won’t recognize most of the voices during the movie. Unlike DreamWorks Animation, which showcases its voice casts, here the voices serve the characters rather than vice versa. Thus Jeremy Piven and Salma Hayek may play rival pirates, but you probably won’t notice that until the closing credits. Other notables include Al Roker, David Tennant, Anton Yelchin, and Brendan Gleeson. Even Hugh Grant in the lead doesn’t stand out.

That doesn’t mean he fails to do the job. He’s actually wonderfully amusing as the Pirate Captain. It’s just that you’re more likely to sit there and go, “Where have I heard him before?” rather than recognize his voice.

“The Pirates! Band of Misfits” is an entertaining piece of animated nonsense that shouldn’t be left to just the kids. They’ll have a good time, but so will the adults who take them… or go by themselves.***

Daniel M. Kimmel is a veteran movie critic and author of a host of film-related books, the most recent being Jar Jar Binks Must Die… And Other Observations About Science Fiction Movies. He teaches film at Suffolk University and lives in Somerville.

Review – The Five Year Engagement

With Jason Segel, Emily Blunt, Chris Pratt, Alison Brie, Rhys Ifans. Written by Jason Segel, Nicholas Stoller. Directed by Nicholas Stoller. Rated R (for sexual content, and language throughout). 124 minutes.

There’s a wonderful 90-minute romantic comedy in THE FIVE-YEAR ENGAGEMENT, but because Judd Apatow (“Funny People”) is one of the producers, it lumbers along for 124 minutes. Why everyone seems to be afraid to tell him his movies need to be more tightly edited remains a mystery. He needs to learn the wisdom of the show business axiom, “Always leave them wanting more.”

Jason Segel (who co-wrote the script with director Nicholas Stoller) plays Tom, who works as a sous-chef in a San Francisco restaurant and dreams of having his own place. At the start of the film he proposes to his girlfriend of one year, Violet (Emily Blunt). They’re adorable. Their friends and family are eccentric. We’re off to a good start.

Complications ensue when Violet gets a post-doctoral appointment to the University of Michigan, and Tom agrees to put his career and their marriage plans on hold for a couple of years so she can take advantage of this fantastic opportunity. Of course, he isn’t able to find such opportunities for himself and ends up working in a local deli. By reminding us of how devoted they are as a couple, the movie avoids the trap of making this a comedy about Tom being continually humiliated. Indeed, they both find themselves in strange situations and making the most of their opportunities.

At this point you may start noticing plot threads not leading anywhere, like a few lines dealing with Tom and Violet’s religious differences. You may even have begun to suspect that no thought at all has been given to focusing the material. By the time we get to the painfully obvious plot manipulations which require Tom and Violet to break up and then get back together we’ve meandered so far from the main story you may wonder if they’ve simply filmed the first draft of the script. After Violet and her supervising professor (Rhys Ifans) exchange a drunken kiss, we have an extended chase scene of Tom chasing the professor, leading to the professor defending himself with martial arts, something neither foreshadowed nor ever referred to again. It’s an ability that seems to exist solely for one joke.

The final half hour or so dissipates much of the good will the film has built up. There are some genuine laughs here, but by the time we have to go into long narratives about Tom and Violet’s separate lives simply to reach the conclusion we knew was coming from the start, you may be focusing more on your watch than the screen. If only they had used the same shorthand that’s employed in relating the film’s truly nutty relationship – between Violet’s sister (Alison Brie) and Tom’s co-worker (Chris Pratt) – this would be a much stronger movie.•••

Daniel M. Kimmel is a veteran movie critic and author of a host of film-related books, the most recent being Jar Jar Binks Must Die… And Other Observations About Science Fiction Movies. He teaches film at Suffolk University and lives in Somerville.

Review – The Raven

With John Cusack, Luke Evans, Alice Eve, Brendan Gleeson, Kevin McNally. Written by Ben Livingston, Hannah Shakespeare. Directed by James McTeigue. Rated R (for bloody violence and grisly images). 111 minutes.

A news story this week announced that a statue to Edgar Allen Poe is to be erected in Boston. That’s very nice, but the fact is that Poe was not happy in his birthplace – he called it “Frogpondium” – and made his home in Baltimore. It is there he enjoyed what success he had in his lifetime and it there he is buried having died at the age of 40, remembered as the father of the modern mystery story as well as numerous poems and tales of macabre.

Poe was a controversial figure, maligned by his enemies, and who often lived in dire financial straits. He died under mysterious circumstances – variously attributed to alcoholism, drug addiction, consumption, or a brain disease – and it those meager facts which serve as the basis for THE RAVEN, a fictional account of the end of Poe’s life. Poe (played by John Cusack sporting an un-Poe-etic beard) gets caught up in a mystery in which someone is recreating the gruesome deaths the writer depicted in his stories (which is exactly the way the popular TV series “Castle” began).

So Detective Fields (Luke Evans) and Poe have to try to solve the mystery, but in spite of the killer taking his inspiration from Poe’s stories, the mystery itself owes little to Poe. Indeed, it the endangerment of Poe’s beloved (Alice Eve) that leads to the climactic showdown, with little sense of the dark and twisted motivations in Poe’s works. Take away all the 19^th century atmospherics, and this could be an episode of some contemporary TV crime drama. One of the chief complaints about the film is the lack of sense for the time period, from the clumsy dialogue to the references to a “serial killer,” a term that would not be coined for more than a hundred years.

Cusack is an interesting actor with a broad range from comedy to drama to genre material like this, but he can’t do it alone. We never get a sense of the actual writer, only of a character caught up in a bizarre mystery against his will. Indeed, the script even makes him the prime suspect at first since whom else would use the devices of his stories to murder?

Perhaps that’s the real problem with “The Raven.” It posits an interesting idea and then doesn’t know what to do with it. It’s not so much that that this is a terrible film as it’s one that needed a lot more thought before they started shooting. If you’re going to have Poe as a character in a work of fiction, you should make good use of him, instead of just sticking him into a patchwork thriller. Poe has inspired generations of authors, filmmakers, and even musicians – check out the Alan Parsons Project’s classic “Tales of Mystery and Imagination” – but if this isn’t at the bottom of the list neither does it do for Poe what “Amadeus” did for Mozart.•••

Daniel M. Kimmel is a veteran movie critic and author of a host of film-related books, the most recent being Jar Jar Binks Must Die… And Other Observations About Science Fiction Movies. He teaches film at Suffolk University and lives in Somerville.

Review – The Lucky One

With Zac Efron, Taylor Schilling, Blythe Danner. Riley Thomas Stewart, Jay R. Ferguson. Written by Will Fetters. Directed by Scott Hicks. Rated PG-13 (for some sexuality and violence). 101 minutes.

In THE LUCKY ONE, Logan (Zac Efron) comes back from Iraq after several tours of duty. He survived a terrible attack because he walked over to retrieve a photo of a young woman. This unknown woman becomes his guardian angel and when he returns to States, he sets out to find out who she is. Yes, we are in Nicholas Sparks territory, and maudlin romance is on the menu.

When he shows up in North Carolina with his dog, he finds that Beth (Taylor Schilling) is a divorced mother of a young boy who runs a kennel. Her ex-husband Keith (Jay R. Ferguson) is an obnoxious jerk who wants to continue bossing her around and doesn’t like this new man in her life. Meanwhile, her mother Ellie (Blythe Danner) can be expected to make the feisty and honest comments the audience is thinking and that Beth needs to hear.

Any bets where this is going? This is a paint-by-numbers romance without a trace of subtlety, wit or sophistication. Of course Logan can’t bring himself to tell Beth what brought him there up front and instead pretends he’s looking for a job. He bonds with her son Ben (Riley Thomas Stewart) who – ho, ho – kicks Logan’s butt at chess. He has run-ins with Keith, who doesn’t appreciate that Logan is ex-military. And, naturally, he and Beth fall in love – with Ellie’s blessing – but with that deep, dark secret hanging over them.

Apparently, Logan has never seen a single movie where holding out on your girlfriend inevitably leads to a major crisis of trust, and doesn’t realize that the longer he waits the tougher it will be. By the time there’s a storm and Ben is in danger, you realize the movie theater needs an optometrist on call to help viewers suffering excessive strain from rolling their eyes. This is claptrap and whether you enjoy it or not there’s absolutely no reason to take it seriously.

Zac Efron continues to prove himself serious eye candy for the ladies in his post “High School Musical” roles, but has yet to land the role where he’s required to be more than a cardboard cutout. (He came closest in the little seen – alas – “Me And Orson Welles.”) Wayland native Taylor Schilling is fetching and engaging, but isn’t required to be much more than that in a barely-sketched in role. And veteran actress Blythe Danner shows she can get more mileage phoning it in than the rest of the cast can achieve acting up a storm.

In the same way unlucky women get dragged to pedestrian action movies on dates, unlucky guys will have to endure “The Lucky One.” Get a big tub of popcorn, chew slowly, and if you don’t complain too much afterwards, it’s possible you may be “The Lucky One” after all.•••

Daniel M. Kimmel is a veteran movie critic and author of a host of film-related books, the most recent being Jar Jar Binks Must Die… And Other Observations About Science Fiction Movies. He teaches film at Suffolk University and lives in Somerville.